Using Human Design to Navigate My Relationships

September 21, 2021

Hi! Iā€™m Krista.
Human Design educator, 4/1 Projector, mom to a three-year-old Manifestor named Maddie, and huge fan of Dramione fan-fiction.
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If I had to choose my favorite application of Human Design, it would be relationships.

Every single one of my close relationships has benefited hugely from my study of Human Design, and from understanding why people in my life are the way that they are.

For example, HD has given me a new lens through which to view my own childhood, as a misunderstood Projector growing up in a household of Generators. It’s also given me insight into the mechanics of my partner (a 2/4 Sacral Manifesting Generator) and my daughter (a 1/4 Emotional Manifestor), and how all of our energies/auras interact.

By learning about your own design and the design of your close friends and family, you can learn how to best support the people closest to you, how to guide them back into alignment with their true selves, and why some people are so very different from you (Human Design is dubbed the “science of differentiation”, after all!).

I have an entire podcast episode dedicated to the topic of Human Design and Family Dynamics, but in today’s post I want to share two very practical ways I’ve used Human Design to navigate my most important relationships recently.

Navigating Relationships Based on My Human Design

1. Tapping into my partner’s Strategy of Responding with Household Chores.

Ladies, I think most of us would love for our partners to help out more around the house, am I right? But what I’ve noticed is that my partner doesn’t often take the initiative to do chores (with a few exceptions). And neither of us like it when I (quote-unquote) nag.

So I had an idea…

What if instead of just hoping or expecting him to notice things around the house that need to be done/cleaned, I wrote out a list with chores that I would handle and chores I would like him to do? And then I left said list out on the kitchen counter, clearly visible?

I tried out this strategy a few weekends in a row, and let me tell you, it worked like a charm.

Why? Because it gave Scott something to respond to.

As a Generator aura type, he doesn’t often get the urge to initiate things; rather, he needs something in his physical environment that he can respond to. Once his defined Sacral Center responds, he can move into action.

And that means all our chores got done and crossed off the list.

Side Note: I’ve also learned that when we’re trying to decide on a restaurant to order takeout from, I should ask him a yes/no question, or give him two options maximum. This allows him to tap into his sacral yes/no response without overwhelming him.

2. Not taking my daughter’s emotions personally.

My daughter is a 1/4 Emotional Manifestor and honestly, she can be a little firecracker sometimes. Coming from parents who both have undefined Solar Plexus Centers, this felt very overwhelming to both of us at first. Before having Maddie, Scott and I had a very calm relationship and life, and neither of us experienced strong emotions all that often.

But now, we have this little bundle of joy who experiences BIG emotions.

In fact, the specific emotional wave defined in her chart is all about spontaneous bursts of emotion that usually have no known cause or predicator. They just happen! So one minute she’s happily playing and crawling around, and the next she’s whining/crying/angry/having a meltdown.

Thankfully the emotional bursts don’t usually last very long, and I’ve learned that I’m not doing anything wrong when Maddie expresses a big emotion (and more often than not, nothing is actually wrong, it’s just her emotional wave). This is a lesson I’m hoping to take with me in the years to come, as I constantly remind myself that with my completely open Solar Plexus Center, I don’t need to absorb or amplify her emotions. I can stay in my own calm, peaceful emotional bubble.

Have you looked at the Human Design of your close friends and family, and explored how your energy interacts with theirs? What have been your biggest takeaways or a-ha moments?

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